<<< ACS::SYS$WORKDISK:[SCRATCH.MSW8629]ANIME.NOTE;1 >>> -< ANIME >- ================================================================================ Note 19.381 scripts 381 of 419 ACS::FEB3553 893 lines 31-MAY-1993 14:04 -< Capt. Tailor1.txt >- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just found this one on r.a.a. I've heard a little about it but can't remember a damn thing about it. I guess I'll just have to read the script. anonymous IRRESPONSIBLE CAPTAIN TAILOR EPISODE 1 Copyright(C) 1993 Yoshioka Hitoshi/Tailor Project/Kadokawa Shoten Translation Copyright (C) 1993 Tonghyun Kim PLANNING: Tailor Project BASED ON STORY BY: Yoshioka Hitoshi IRRESPONSIBLE CAPTAIN TAILOR OP: Just think of tomorrow Let's continue the journey to the place that's not on any maps. I'LL BE HOLDING NEVER LET YOU GO Grab what you want with your hands. Let's go wherever we want, Carrying something that's more certain than the words, SAIL AWAY FOR THE FUTURE right away Something unknown is waiting for us Throw away all your worries and COME TOGETHER JUST THINK OF TOMORROW. DIRECTOR: Mashita Kouichi TAILOR Let's go! EPISODE 1: THE MYSTERIOUS IRRESPONSIBLE MAN Translated by Tonghyun "Vajra" Kim Edited by John Yoon and Mike "Alphonse" Studte NORIKO Please do Noriko a favor. Make use of your talents. NORIKO The defender of galactic peace and guardian of nature...my hero! (SCROLL) % Young man! The United Planets Space Force wants you! (BACKGROUND NOISE) % The military situation is deteriorating... NORIKO We're waiting for you! FUJI Gentlemen. If we fail to act now, the might of the Rarlgon Empire will continue to grow until they have the strength to gain complete control over the outer sector of our galaxy. FUJI I've heard that the new empress of Rarlgon is still young and unable to gain firm control over the various factions in the Empire vying for power. They're in no condition to prepare for a war. FUJI An army without a strong chain of command is nothing but rabble. FUJI However, our forces are highly dedicated. Our talented commanders and experienced troops will make crushing the enemy mere child's play. FUJI Now is the time to send our forces on a blitzkrieg across the Rarlgon Empire and bring them to their knees. FUJI These are my conclusions. FUJI I want to hear the opinion of Admiral Mifune, the commander of outer galactic fleet. MIFUNE I think you have a point, Admiral Fuji. Given the current situation, I'm confident that my outer galactic fleet can destroy 40% of the Rarlgon Empire's fleet within a month. FUJI As expected of the renowned Admiral Mifune. Then you agree with my assessment of the situation? MIFUNE No. I'm against your plan. FUJI What? MIFUNE We shouldn't underestimate the Rarlgon Empire. We'll be able to hold our own against them for about a year but when it becomes a long war, it's inevitable that our force, whose total production capacity is inferior to that of the enemy, will gradually be outgunned by the enemy. MIFUNE I believe a quick victory over the Rarlgon Empire is also unlikely. MIFUNE Furthermore, inside the Rarlgon Empire, most believe that we are the ones behind the accidental death of the emperor. Their morale will exceed ours since they consider us to be the enemy of their late emperor. FUJI What if the enemy attempts a preemptive strike? MIFUNE Don't worry. My fleet is on stand-by for just such a possibility. MIFUNE We can afford to wait and see what will happen. We can use the time to observe the Rarlgon Empire under the new empress and determine if they will attempt a preemptive strike. WANG There is no longer any doubt that the death of the late Emperor Goza 15th was due to a conspiracy by the United Planets Space Force. WANG Your Majesty, you should personally lead our force and punish the United Planets Space Force. I believe that's the only path left for the glorious Rarlgon Empire. AZALING WANG. WANG Yes, Your Majesty. AZALING Is there any way that we can avoid the war? WANG No, Your Majesty. WANG Your Majesty, the decision rests with you. WANG Please pardon my rudeness but if you make the decision, I'll do my best to carry out your wishes. WANG We're waiting for your wise decision! NORIKO We're waiting for you! PETTY OFFICER What? Say that again. TAILOR I told you. I want to have a comfortable life. PETTY OFFICER Is that really why you're applying for the glorious United Planets Space Force? TAILOR That's right. PETTY OFFICER Jus... TAILOR Justy Ueki Tailor, 20 years old. PETTY OFFICER WELL Mr. Tailor, why do you think military life would be so "comfortable?" TAILOR Well, that's because you get food, as well as the uniform and other daily necessities for free. TAILOR I don't have to worry about the rent and it'll be a piece of cake to acquire various licenses. TAILOR In addition, if I get stationed on a space cruiser, I'll be able to sleep all day in a cryogenic capsule until the ship arrives at the battlefield. TAILOR And if I can get a cushy desk job, there'll be nothing easier than the life of a soldier. TAILOR Right? PETTY OFFICER Do you know what the space force is supposed to do? TAILOR Well, that's war. Your Excellency. PETTY OFFICER Cut the "Your Excellency" crap! TAILOR And after the retirement, I can live a comfortable and elegant life with a pension. Isn't it so cool? PETTY OFFICER I guess you have never thought the possibility that you might actually get killed in a war. PETTY OFFICER Hell, don't you know that soldiers in the front-line sacrifice themselves and their families to carry out their duties to the country? PETTY OFFICER The military is not such a lenient place! TAILOR Well, well. TAILOR You have the wonderful eyes that can find the hidden talents inside applicants. TAILOR Let's suppose that I was accepted by the Space Force and unexpectedly achieved great accomplishments. PETTY OFFICER Impossible. TAILOR No, you can never predict the tides of war. TAILOR Your Excellency, please listen. TAILOR Then, what would happen? TAILOR Let's suppose that I kept getting promoted by chance and finally became the captain of a space cruiser before I even realized. PETTY OFFICER You mean a Colonel? TAILOR Well, let's say I became a Fleet Admiral, not a mere Colonel. TAILOR In truth, my historical achievements would not have been possible if it were not for a certain person's power of observation. TAILOR That's right. It's you, Your Excellency. PETTY OFFICER Huh? TAILOR That's right. You, who had discovered the talents of Admiral Tailor when he was still unknown, and approved his application, deserve the recognition. TAILOR Then the upper echelons of the Space Force wouldn't let you go unrewarded. You'll be guaranteed a comfortable life for the rest of your life. I envy you. PETTY OFFICER Hey, don't exaggerate things too much. TAILOR And after my retirement, I'll write an autobiography. On the very first page I'll write "Behind my glorious achievements, there was the presence of a Chief Petty Officer. I dedicate this autobiography to His Excellency the Chief Petty Officer." TAILOR The babes will be after ya and your face will be on TV and newspapers.. EVERYWHERE. You'll be a superstar in no time! I envy you. You lucky devil. TAILOR Huh? PETTY OFFICER Hmm...TV would be a bit too much... FUJI Can't you understand? MIFUNE No, I can't. MIFUNE No way can I send our main force into the midst of the enemy. And although the new empress is young, we don't know what's on her mind yet. FUJI What a joke. How could such a spineless person be a commander of the United Planets Space Force? MIFUNE What? MIFUNE You bastard! Are you trying to insult me? FUJI Oh well, I guess not even you, who was once a brave general, could withstand the ravages of time. FUJI What are you doing? Are you trying to kill me, the Chief of the General Staff? FUJI What's wrong? Is there nothing behind the lion's roar? WANG Majesty, your decision please. WANG Your Majesty! AZALING I see. AZALING As Goza 16th of the Holy Rarlgon Empire, I give you my orders. Our empire will punish the despicable United Planets Space Force in my name. WANG Your Majesty! I compliment you on a wise decision! WANG Everything will be carried out according to your wishes. DOM Damn that Wang. He finally seized control of our force by sparking the fire of revenge inside the Empress' heart. AZALING Who is it? AZALING You saw it, didn't you? DOM Yes, I did. My deepest sympathies. AZALING What are you talking about? I'm Goza 16th, the empress of the Holy Rarlgon Empire. The proud empress shouldn't cry, even over the death of her parents. AZALING What you have seen was an illusion. Strike it from your mind. I command you to do so. DOM No. The tears of sadness hold no shame for even an empress. Forgive me, but I must say that it moves me to know that you're a real person. AZALING How rude! Watch your mouth! How can I not be ashamed when a subject of mine saw... DOM You're not just passionate but have a kind and gentle heart. You're truly an Empress whom we would not hesitate to sacrifice our lives for. DOM As long as you have those tears, the warriors of the empire would gladly lay down their lives for you. AZALING What is your name? AZALING Tell me your name. DOM Ru Baraba Dom, the captain of cruiser Dorome, belonging to the Holy Rarlgon Empire 27th Outer Galactic Force, 66th Special Task Fleet. AZALING So your name is Dom. How dare a mere captain of cruiser speak so bluntly before me! AZALING I'll remember your name. LOWANER Hey, Dom! There you are. DOM Admiral Lowaner. LOWANER I've been looking for you. Your fleet has received orders. DOM My ship has? LOWANER Damn that WANG. Giving out orders as soon as he assumed supreme command.. DOM I see. What is it about? LOWANER It's... Dom, actually... OPERATOR Open the tertiary navigational reactor! Oil Pressure Optimal! Ready to launch! DOM Cruiser Dorome, commence launch! DOM Activate the primary power sphere! TAILOR I've really had it. TAILOR If I'm gonna work for the Space Force anyway, I better ask them to assign me to a comfortable position like the captain of a cruiser, or the pension department where I can have lots of free time. TAILOR What should I do now? AI (MALE) Psychological aptitude test. Justy Ueki Tailor. Male. Age 20. Application Number: I-7. Is there anything wrong with the above information? TAILOR This sucks. Why the hell do I have to talk with a dirty man in a hole like this? AI (MALE) Dirty man? TAILOR Please don't close-up on your face. AI (MALE) This is the first time that I heard such an insult from a mere applicant! AI (MALE) Shit! AI (FEMALE) I'll take his place. TAILOR This is it! TAILOR This is what I wanted! I would have been so happy if you came out in in the place. AI (FEMALE) You're Justy Ueki Tailor. Male. Age 20. Application Number: I-7. Anything wrong with the above information? TAILOR No, nothing wrong. By the way, what's your name? AI (FEMALE) I'm a Virtual Humanoid, a perfect artificial intelligence programmed by a state of the art computer to make it easier for applicants to take the test. Therefore, I don't have a personal name. Since your behavior and speech are also evaluated as a part of test, please think carefully before answering... AI (FEMALE) What's the matter? TAILOR That's right. Betty is a good name. AI (FEMALE) Huh? TAILOR Anyway, that's your name. AI (FEMALE) Betty? TAILOR That's right. Betty is such a nice name. AI (FEMALE) My name is Betty... AI (FEMALE) Then I'll begin the test. Question 1: Assume that you are on an uninhabited island. Your enemy is also on the island. Neither of you has a weapon. What would you do in this situation? AI (FEMALE) Mr. Tailor, please answer. TAILOR Tha... AI (FEMALE) Mr. Tailor, your such behavior will also be evaluated! TAILOR Hmm... AI (FEMALE) Mr. Tailor, please answer the question! TAILOR That's right! Those glasses! Those glasses just don't fit you. AI (FEMALE) Incomprehensible. That is not an acceptable response for the question. TAILOR Don't get so mad. TAILOR Because I couldn't get those glasses out of my mind, I forgot the question. TAILOR Try taking them off, Betty. AI (FEMALE) You shouldn't, Mr. Tailor. Please give them back to me. Please give those glasses back, Mr. Tailor! TAILOR You're much more attractive without the glasses. You're a real knockout. AI (FEMALE) Mr. Tailor, you're such a flatterer. TAILOR I'm not. TAILOR You're cute even when you're angry, but now.. you take my breath away. AI (FEMALE) Mr. Tailor, please try to answer the question more seriously. TAILOR Yes, yes. My soul is yours to explore. AI (FEMALE) Question 2. What if you... AI (FEMALE) Please don't stare at me like that. TAILOR Your round eyes, your small and cute nose, and your lovely earlobes... AI (FEMALE) Oh dear, Mr. Tailor. I haven't finished the question yet. TAILOR The question is unimportant. TAILOR If you were a real human, men from around the world would be at your feet. TAILOR This is my answer. AI (FEMALE) Stop that, Mr. Tailor. What are you talking about? It's incomprehensible. I can't understand. TAILOR Yes, you can. You're not only beautiful but smart as well. AI (FEMALE) It's incomprehensible. Mr. Tailor, I've never met a man like you before. OPERATOR Uh-Oh. Access other mainframes immediately! OPERATOR Access the computer in HQ immediately! FUJI You can't carry out modern day warfare with justice and mercy! AI (FEMALE) Please stop that... MIFUNE Shut up! Do you think I can give up after being insulted like that? AI (FEMALE) Please. Please don't say anything else... FUJI No, I won't change my mind. The future of our Space Force depends on this! AI (FEMALE) No, I can't understand. Is that your answer? Or did we fall in love? FUJI What the hell was that? Is this your doing? MIFUNE You idiot! AI (FEMALE) Please give me the answer quickly. Please. TAILOR But you haven't gave me the second question... AI (FEMALE) I don't care about the questions! This is love! This is true love! Where am I? Who am I? TAILOR Even if you say so...(there is nothing I can do about it.) AI (FEMALE) You're such a teaser...please answer! TAILOR Please wait. TAILOR Let's call it quits. TAILOR Why you...! TAILOR It's my turn now. AI (FEMALE) Please stop. I'm very delicate... AI (FEMALE) I can't take it...I can't take it anymore... AI (FEMALE) I can't take it if you keep doing that... AI (FEMALE) I....I....I...I don't know what's going on anymore.... AI (FEMALE) No... AI (FEMALE) Tailor, where are you? AI (FEMALE) Tailor, where are you? Please answer me, Tailor! AI (FEMALE) Where are you? TAILOR Oh, shoot. It's broken. AI (FEMALE) I got a broken heart. It hurts so bad. You must take responsibility for this! TAILOR Responsibility? TAILOR Uh...It's not my fault. AI (FEMALE) Tailor, you're not trying to abandon me after shattering my heart into little pieces, are you? AI (FEMALE) You're so cruel! You're so irresponsible. AI (FEMALE) I can't forgive you! I can't! AI (FEMALE) You're the enemy of women! No...the enemy of all mankind! OPERATOR Alert! The artificial intelligence... FUJI What the hell is going on? AI (FEMALE) You're the enemy! You're the enemy of mankind! MIFUNE Don't panic! Cut all lines and switch to the manual mode. OPERATOR Yes, sir. FUJI That's a high speed cruiser of the Rarlgon Empire! It has already entered our sector of space. This must be a diversionary attack by the Rarlgon Empire. FUJI It seems that while you were acting like a coward, the enemy got impatient and decided to strike. FUJI So Admiral Mifune, you're going to blast the Rarlgon Empire away for us in no time at all, eh? DOM'S AID Captain Dom. DOM'S AID The enemy has sighted us. They are approaching at full speed. DOM Beautiful... DOM'S AID Sir? DOM This universe is too beautiful to be tainted with the blood of the cowardly United Planets Space Force. PETTY OFFICER Where is the enemy? Where did he run away? TAILOR It's me. It's Tailor. PETTY OFFICER You! You were OK! You're such a lucky fellow. TAILOR Eh? PETTY OFFICER Looks like an agent of Rarlgon Empire has sneaked in and destroyed the artificial intelligence. TAILOR An agent? TAILOR Oh dear, what'll happen to me? PETTY OFFICER You passed. TAILOR Huh? PETTY OFFICER Who gives a damn about an aptitude test when a war just broke out? PETTY OFFICER Just sign the paper on my desk and you're ready to go. PETTY OFFICER I'll go ahead and get that spy. Got it? PETTY OFFICER Tailor! TAILOR What is it? PETTY OFFICER If you make it out of this alive, don't forget to write an autobiography! TAILOR Yes, sir. Leave this war to me! NORIKO We're waiting for you (x 5) PREVIEW (YAMAMOTO'S NARRATION) When people get old, they get money. People call it a pension. What will Tailor, who has been assigned to the Pension Department, see there? Next episode: Hey! The happy retirement life! CAST Tailor Tsujitani "Kubo" Kouji Dom Toshi "Tieh" Sekihiko Fuji Nishimura "Jamitov" Tomomichi Mifune Mugi "Principal" Hito Azaling Kasahara "Maron" Hiroko Betty Komiya "Youshi" Kazue Noriko Kawamura "Quess" Maria ED: DOWN TOWN DANCE He is a playful fellow who draws people's attention just by walking on the streets So he will become the star from now on Count down for transformation 1 2 3 4 5 breathe in 1 2 Come on, let's file out right now DOWN TOWN DANCE... ******************************************************************** * Tonghyun "Vajra" Kim * * Operation X/UC HERALD * * * * "Anime version of Tailor is TOO handsome!" * * - Yoshioka Hitoshi, the creator of Irresponsible Capt. Tailor - * ********************************************************************